by Jenny Garnica, Bilingual Legal Advocate with Project Safeguard
To learn more about Project Safeguards services, please visit their website.
Safety planning is such an important tool when preparing our clients for real life situations. Creating a plan helps the client to use their own thinking skills and challenges them to take action of their situations. I always remind my clients when going through the safety plan that this exercise is not to create fear in them or for them to feel afraid, but it is a tool that will help them become prepared and have a plan whether a dangerous situation may arise. Our clients want to feel safe and giving them an opportunity to evaluate their situations allows for preparedness and a sense of relief.
I like to think of safety planning as a way for survivors to gain back control of their situation and know that they have the power to make better and sharper choices. Whether they choose to create an emergency bag to make leaving the home easier, to creating an escape plan/map with their family, or teaching children in the home how to call the police, any little choice can change the direction of any situation. It is sometimes the small choices that can change the course of a dangerous encounter. At times, all a survivor needs is a little assistance, but more than anything, encouragement for them to think for themselves. I often hear survivors say, “I never thought of it that way.” or “I didn’t think that would be an option.” I believe that they knew all along, but just needed that opportunity for them to really reflect and challenge themselves to put those thoughts into a plan.
One of my favorite subjects in the safety plan is how to stay safe emotionally. I love to talk about this with my clients because it is something that is often overlooked. I like to ask my clients what they do for themselves, and often they seem dumbfounded or lost for words. They can’t seem to think of the personal things that make them smile or the things they once enjoyed. I often use the example of an airplane emergency. If an emergency should arise, it is instructed that we put the oxygen mask on ourselves first before assisting someone else. Why is that? A person cannot fully assist if they are not well taken care of first. This is the same with everyday situations. I try to remind my clients that they need to practice self-care and do things for them. I have seen survivors cry when asked this question because they can’t remember the last time they’ve done something that makes them happy. When dealing with domestic violence situations, it’s very easy to want to place all care and attention on the children. I often hear survivors say that will now solely focus on their child. – For those who are not a parent, court cases and appointments can be overwhelming and tiresome, with no time to take care of those very important needs. When our clients start to think of the things that make their heart happy, such as taking a walk at the park, taking a bubble bath or remembering a song they really love, it’s always worth seeing the smile on their face.
Safety planning is more than just a tool, it is a way for a client to gain back control. Giving clients this tool does not only give them a sense of relief, but it also helps empower them in many different ways.